How to deal with depression when you have unsupportive family and friends

           Families wants to protect themselves and their mindsets by attacking and defending their family member. When someone needs a treatment of depression, families simply refuse by saying its nothing but just a feeling. People say go out and watch a movie you will feel better, without realizing that a person is going through a brain illness. For example, If a women who go through the severe depression and her family is denying the fact and putting out the argument that she does all this on purpose, to irritate everyone. She doesn’t have any friends because everyone thinks she is acting abnormal to gain attention, without being curious about her situation and behavior. Friends and families take decisions without investigating about symptoms of the illness, they think they are right even when they are wrong.

Sometimes people blame their depression on family. They made their family responsible for their condition. I believe some people have inferiority complex, where they compare their current scenarios with others and not being grateful about what they have and give themselves anxiety. Cause of this condition is our own created situations which effects our mindsets. For example, some students say my family is not giving me enough time which makes me feel depressed and not letting me focus on my studies. Some people say my parents cannot afford me a new car which makes me feel depressed.

If we stop comparing ourselves and conditions with others, we may feel better and positive. We should stop assuming the worst. If we seeing others in a good situation then us, we should take motivation from it rather get depressed. We should not allow our bad thinking takeover our mindsets, we all have that power to choose positive over negative.

          Depression exist and it doesn’t go away if you keep distracting yourself from temporary solutions. “Important part in this argument is, it is true if you go out and meet people you will feel better for time being but on the other side you also need a treatment”. Both things are mutually exclusive. You either keep distracting yourself, go out meet people or you straight go for the treatment and finished it all.

I believe “it is not mutually exclusive it has more options. If a person doesn’t want a treatment or a temporary solution he or she can go with the counseling. Where all they need to do is talking with a completely stranger and feel better, other choice would be therapy where you meet bunch of people and do yoga’s and exercise together.

                 Zero sum thinking is actually harmful way of thinking for others and us as well. A person who is going through a depression is in a gain and loss situation. Depressed person believes their loss is other persons gain. That’s why they feel hesitant in treatments and medication. People generally believe that they have no other options and choices except win and lose, their believe is one person winning making others losers. When there are more choices available but they believe on false dilemma and make their own life difficult. Some families say feeling depressed all the time is okay, just take a deep breath you feel better. That’s how everybody treats a depressed person because that’s the culture and mindset of our society.

Another mindset of people we have who actually ignore the relevant facts that depression exist and it required a treatment they act bias. For example, people know how depression takes a person towards suicide but still they ignore the fact and act non serious because they make judgment based on their experience’s and bias conditions. There are many examples we have read and seen on tv how the teenager commit suicide because their parents have never listened and noticed his or her behavioral changes, because those parents were so sure about their experiences that they ignore what is happening to their child. Usually a parent of a disturb child says my child is doing this on purpose because he doesn’t want to give exam or study, they actually judging their children based on their bias thinking, in the end they actually lose their child.

               Some families think negative about everything which actually forces them to make bad decisions. In depression families don’t see very good results because they don’t take depression seriously, that lead them to believe that depression is un treatable illness. If one person says that depression is nothing just a feeling, he is actually putting in everyone’s brain around him that never care about the people who comes to you and tells you how depressed and helpless they feel. They are actually becoming bias and promoting negative impact on others around them.

              Not everyone understands the problem of depression, it’s a long process to treat and families don’t want to involve in it to investigate. All a person needs are help. For example, medication, counseling, therapy. Families need to think that there may be a reason that has nothing to do with them. if families support their family member from depression, they are actually putting that person one step closer to a better and more fulfilled life. If that specific person cannot think this way then their families and friend’s responsibility is to convince that particular member and show them how many options they have in life.

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